Aftermath
by theauthorkaty
Summary: Short Barisi fic based on Barba's interrogation and Carisi's grand jury testimony in "Community Policing." What happens back at home, behind closed doors.


Rafael fumbled for his keys in his briefcase, trying to be as quiet as possible. He put his key in the door and turned the knob slowly, so as to not wake Sonny. He had been out for who knows how long, nursing a vodka tonic, and trying to forget everything about this horrible case. He was surprised to see Sonny, lying on the couch, the glowing TV the only source of light in the room. "Hey," he said quietly, sighing as he shut the door behind him and tossed his keys into the basket on the side table. Sonny didn't respond, and at first Rafael thought he had fallen asleep on the couch watching TV. He walked in front of the couch and saw that indeed, he was wide awake, and staring at the TV blankly. Rafael bent down and kissed his forehead.

"I didn't expect you to still be up. Sorry I was out so late, I..."

"What _was_ that in court today?," Sonny said angrily, as he snapped to life and sat up, looking Rafael straight in the eyes, his anger barely contained in his deep blue eyes.

Rafael was surprised to hear Sonny raise his voice, as he was usually so quiet (at least at home), and he couldn't help but feel immediately defensive. The case had been hell for everyone involved and he wanted nothing more than to sink into Sonny's long, lean arms and fall asleep in peace, forgetting about the day.

"What do you mean, 'what _was_ that?,'" Rafael practically spit back at him. "I was doing my job," his usual Barba sass returning, "just like you said you were doing yours," he said, cocking his head to the side and raising an eyebrow as he looked down at Sonny.

"I _was_ doing my job!" Sonny jumped to his feet, his face mere inches from Rafael's. "I responded to a 10-13, just like Fin, hell, just like Olivia would have done! How can you question what happened? In open court? That was embarrassing. I felt like I was being scolded by my mother for breaking curfew or something. And since when don't you know what a 10-13 is? Jesus!"

"Of _course_ I know what a 10-13 is! Don't you understand my job? I am an ADA; I have to prosecute a case and ask witnesses questions that of course I already know the answer to. That's how a case goes! This wasn't about you!" His voice had gotten louder and he was nearly shouting. They were so close that Rafael's breath was hot on Sonny's and Sonny's breath had intensified right along with Rafael, his face flushed and his eyes fuming. Sonny pursed his lips tightly, and Rafael's nostrils flared.

Neither of them said anything for a minute, and finally Rafael took a deep breath and licked his lips. "Listen," he said quietly, gripping the front of Sonny's shirt and looking pleadingly into his eyes, "if we are going to do this then you need to understand there's work and there's personal life. I have to do my job, and you have to do yours. What happens in court isn't about you personally." He whispered, "it's work. That's all."

"You don't know what it's like for us! You just sit there and throw out accusations in court to try to win political points with the mayor. Do you think any cop wants to be the one to kill an innocent person? It's my worst nightmare! Do you think anyone is proud of what happened?"

"Listen to me," Rafael said, gripping Sonny's shirt as if his life depended on it, "I worry about you every single day. Every day that you're out on the streets, I am terrified that something is going to happen to you. I _know_ the danger you face every day, and it scares the shit out of me, Sonny. That's MY worst nightmare." His voice began to break. "I don't want anything to ever happen to you…I don't know what I'd do without you." His bowed his head and felt tears stinging his eyes as Sonny wrapped his arms tightly around him and held him quietly.

"You know basically every NYPD cop hates you right now?" Sonny chuckled, awkwardly trying to lighten the mood. "You'll probably need a police detail. Good thing you've got me."

Rafael lifted his head to look into Sonny's eyes. "It wouldn't be the first time," he said with a sly smile. "Besides, I only care about impressing one particular SVU Detective," he said as he leaned in to kiss Sonny. He brushed his lips across Sonny's hesitantly at first, but Sonny pulled him closer and deepened the kiss, and Rafael could feel him harden beneath his sweatpants. Rafael broke the kiss and took Sonny's hand. "Let me make it up to you," he purred in his ear. Sonny smiled and followed Rafael eagerly down the hall. They never turned the TV off.


End file.
